I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
