Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
