the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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