I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
