Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize