The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
