Already got asked if we're dating
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
