I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
wow bdsm is so cute
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
