ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
