i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
