Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
