I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
