So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
