she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
