there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
