if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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