so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize