She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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