Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
