did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
