So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
