if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
