Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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