Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
