Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
