I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
