My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize