literally had 100 drinks last night.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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