i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
