Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
