Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize