Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
