For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
