I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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