I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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