thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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