There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
