You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
