If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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