I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
