talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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