I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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