dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Randomize
