Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
