Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize