just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
