butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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