I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
