Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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