I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
