It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
