Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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